Everybody Must Get Scanned
They scan you when you fall and bump your head
They scan you when they think you may be dead
They scan you when your eyes are di-a-lated
They scan you when your brains are mash-potated
They do it so they won't get canned
Everybody must get scanned!
They scan you when you hit a greyhound bus
They scan you when your ears are dripping pus
They scan you when your bones are little pieces
They scan you to complete their Masters thesis
It's the biggest toaster in the land
Everybody must get scanned!
They scan you when your ticker skips a beat
They scan you ‘cause they think it's really neat
They scan you though you try to run away
They scan you on your fave-rit holiday
There must be better ways to get tanned
Every body must get scanned!
They scan you when your spine begins to curve
They scan you when they think you broke a nerve
They scan you when you're old but not forgotten
Unless of course your Medical is rotten
Glowing in the dark is mighty grand
Every body must get scanned!
They scan you when your body takes a bullet
To find out where it is before they pull it
They scan you when you seize or have a spasm
They scan you when you've got a neoplasm
They do it 'fore the thing gets banned
Every body must get scanned!
They scan you if you shake and have the fits
They scan you if you swallow cherry pits
They scan you when they want to look inside
To find out what goes on beneath your hide
It's working like the doctors planned
Every body must get scanned!
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